Melissa Gilbert and Maksim Chmerkovskiy
Bob D'Amico/ABC
Quickstep.Okay, stand with your feet together. Push your pelvis forward until your upper back lies back with your knees bent. Lift your head up and gracefully turn it to the left. Now jump around really, really fast ... backwards ... in three inch heels!
If it feels really unnatural and contradictory to all the rules of logic and science, you are doing the quickstep, my next challenge on Dancing with the Stars.
Who invented this? Where is he? Let me at him!
I didn't want to use the extreme statement just yet but honestly, this is one of the most vexing, frustrating things I have ever asked my body to do. Childbirth is easier.
PHOTOS: DWTS Celeb Candids!God bless my partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy, who, for some unknown reason, believes that I can actually do this and make it look fun and graceful. I want to – I really do.
I absolutely adore Maks and don't want to let him down. I'm hoping that with the costume, makeup, hair, lights and audience, I will rise to the occasion.